I know I have been ranting alot. But I am finally clear headed. Life is looking good. My career is blossoming and I don't have cancer or anything finally got that blood work back.
They don't know what's wrong but at least now I know it is nothing bad. I am finally ready to let you go. You were on my mind for the longest time an I can finally just let go. I don't think I am the relationship type. After all none of mine work out.
Even you left me. I was heartbroken an sore for a while but now I am numb I guess. I am done with letting people in though my walls are here to stay. And maybe I need it that way. After all I am trying to get deployed to Afghanistan to really serve my country. There is nothing here for me. But I feel this nothing is worth fighting for. So that maybe you and your children and everyone else may find what they are searching for.
All my life I felt like my purpose is to help people and that is what I am going to do. I want to stand by my brothers in arms an serve my country well. Being in the military is good for me. I don't really need to have connections with people just brief moments. I know you wanted to explain things to me but I you made your decision to leave.
And I am not looking back. I tried to fight for you but you just did not feel the same way. I will be fine without you I was fine before. I won't forget the times we shared or laser quest. But this is it. I hope you read this Vanessa goodbye. I don't need the lies and bs in my life anymore everyone I have dated has been the same you are like everyone else you said you wanted to stay away from. Please do not me anymore and please no more texts I just wanna forget an move on.
